Sunday, October 22, 2006

Bikini Waxing

If there is one thing in the world you will not catch me doing, it is bikini waxing. I’m sorry, but there are just some things that are sacred and the bikini area is one of those things. Perhaps if I was younger and single I might reconsider, but that is still a long shot. When you go for a bikini waxing, you are baring everything you have to a total stranger, and I’m sorry, but this is something I am not going to do for cosmetic reasons. It is hard enough going to a gynecologist, but at least that is essential for good health.
When you go for bikini waxing, you are going in for some of the most humiliating grooming you can imagine. For the most part, you have to get up on all fours and spread your legs as far as you can, while pushing your butt up into the air. Talk about opening up! This is that technician can get to all the nooks and crannies you have down there. They put hot wax on some of the most sensitive spots you have, and rip it off with a strip of paper. Sure, bikini waxing sounds like fun!
There is really no way you can do this at home, though there are kits out there that claim you can. Unless you have a room full of mirrors and six arms, I doubt you can do a good job on your own. You are welcome to try it, of course, but make sure you don’t call me when you can’t remove the wax, and you have accidentally sat upon something that you are now stuck too. If this happens, you are going to have to call the wax company to figure out what to do. This won’t be the most pleasant phone call you have ever made, though I’m sure the operators are quite used to getting phone calls about home bikini waxing gone wrong.
If you are really uncomfortable with the hair you have in your bikini area, and don’t want to go through a bikini waxing every few weeks, there are other alternatives. You can get laser hair removal for that area. You will still be exposed to someone else for a bit, but for the most part, once you are done, you are done for good. Laser hair removal often takes multiple appointments, and costs a lot more than a regular bikini waxing, but at least you will have it over and done with and won’t have to worry about it again.